life moves fast

lot of things on my mind this week, but I just moved to a nice studio on the Ave so now I can have all these deep contemplative moments in a comfy home.

I was reading this talk, and they said what if someone gave you $86,400 a day and at the end of the day, the money you didn't spend was taken away... you'd want to spend all of it right? but why don't we actually do that? it's actually 86,400 seconds that we get, but it's the same concept. at the end of the day, that time that we don't use doesn't roll over into the next day, there is no way to reclaim it. this has been really heavy on my heart, because I've noticed this year all the time/money/resources (F*cks given -- now that I'm writing this, I definitely remember ranting on something similar) I have spent in the past on social media, or trying to find the perfect outfit, or doing unnecessary things because I don't want to question people -- could've been spent doing so much more.

guys, I deactivated my social media for a few weeks and... I read books. like I actually had time to finish them [while being in school and working and trying to do a million other things]. YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH SO MUCH WHEN YOU #TAKEABREAKFROMFAKE. but on top of that and more importantly I felt better because of it. I didn't feel like I was missing out; I actually felt more connected to people. I noticed more about myself and about people around me. there was also this refreshing feeling of throwing away old bags of papers or something (which I literally did today) when I logged off. I felt lighter or that I had less to manage... so highly recommend getting offline (Plz just try it for a week). also I went on an unfollowing (w/reciprocal removing followers) spree. the people that you could gain something from and they could gain from you enough that you have to follow their social media or you follow there's is probably smaller than your current number; *side note: to the people who are not in my social media influence anymore, I wish you the best but we don't need to follow each other's lives anymore.

adding to my speech on giving sh*ts wisely, and to connect this back to the title of this post, DECISION FATIGUE IS REAL. we have to make a ton of decisions throughout the day and most of them are tiny but the little things add up! our brain has to decide whether to wake up when the alarm rings or to snooze (but in reality snooze for 1min, 2min, 5min, 10, 30, 1hr??) then it has to decide what order we do stuff in (but if we establish a morning routine [which we all should] this part gets easier) but then what do we wear, and what do we eat, and what should we accomplish first and how should we do it - you get da point. but sometime after all those little decisions happen, we're going to have to make an important one/ semi-important one and we're not going to want to think about it. we're going to be indecisive and we'll be so tired of making decisions that we'll just say "I don’t know, I don't care, or you pick". we're going to let other people make important decisions for us, and that's not right. guys, we need to take control of our lives! the strategy: eliminate decision fatigue (& other baggage - both symbolically and literally).

as I was packing my shoebox dorm last week, I realized how much I owned and how little of it I actually use on a regular basis. I found clothes that I forgot I owned. it was real sad. because of that, I've resolved to cut down the amount of stuff I have, especially clothes (hmu if you want anything from my closet). by the time I go to Spain, everything that I wear (clothes, shoes, accessories, makeup, etc) will be able to fit into two suitcases. **another side note: Spain has been really motivating me lately. it's the small goals. my life is kind of a mess right now and I don't know where I'll be by the end of the year but I know that I'll be in Spain sometime in the next 2 years. it's really my only "constant" in life. +God. I don't know what I'd do without God, Jesus, & Spain. real holy trinity. I'm going to hell. BUT BACK TO THE STORY. I've got a lot of important stuff coming up in the next 10 years, and I don't want to be burnt out because of all the little meaningless things, like a closet of clothes I don't wear, or double tapping on a million photos because I want people to think I'm nice (v irrational). this sounds weird even to me, but everything I do & every decision I make has me thinking will this get me to God, Jesus, or Spain? and if it doesn't help me then I usually don't do it. highly also encourage you to find your God/Jesus/Spain. JOIN ME ON ELIMINATING CRAP IN YOUR LIFE (if you send me a message/pic/or something showing how you are taking control of your life, I will donate $1 to charity, not even kidding here y'all. motivation).

there was definitely more I wanted to say, but my train of though is gone... that's all, folks!